formspring
i would like to spill my guts.
formspring round 3
1. who are you?
well, my name is savannah mae, and i am twenty two and i live in saskatoon, saskatchewan. i am six two, i am a sloucher, a slacker, a scatterbrain. i work at a car dealership in the back, i am a parts delivery girl and deliver/ship auto parts all over saskatchewan. i’d like to think that i am a pretty honest person. and i am really awful when it comes to describing myself? i am a person that is overflowing with an embarassing amount of emotion. (but isn’t that what we all say?) whenever somebody asks me this, and i mean really asks me this question i am always kind of dumbfounded, and i always, always think of this one time, it is 3 o’clock in the morning i am sitting in a denny’s booth with my best friend kyle two years ago, and i am telling him a story about a dream that i had and i am going into great amounts of detail and i am swirling salt with my finger in the most ghost world-esque fashion possible, and he is hanging onto my every word, avoiding eye contact to watching my fingers playing with this salt, and he interupts the conversation and he says, “you are an artist in everything that you do.” i don’t know if that is a good enough answer, but i am overflowing and sometimes i feel like there is so much beauty in the world that i don’t know what to do with my hands.
2. are you happy?
well, i am not unhappy. generally speaking, i am a fairly happy person, truly! (i am breathing, afterall.) but, in day to day life? it varies. i had a really terrible day yesterday (it is -40C and i work outside and i was underdressed and a bunch of things went wrong at work, and i had a really heavy heart.) but, today i am happy to be sitting in my bed, in long johns, slippers and a flannel shirt, i adapt to my surroundings?
3. tell me about your most amazing summer yet :)
it was after i went through my hardest break up and i was lonely and miserable, and i had made so many changes in my life, and just moved back home to live with my papa and my oldest friend ended up moving in an apartment block with his girlfriend down the street, i became really close friends with her, and she changed my life in a really remarkable way. we had a small group of friends and most of us were unemployed, we couldn’t afford to do much so we really listened to music, and we played a lot of videogames and sat in their apartment in the living room talking and laughing for hours, and making art, sewing, taking pictures, making videos, dancing!!, writing haiku’s until our brains were going to explode. sitting in the grass outside of their living room window in our underwear at five o’clock in the morning, there were so many thunderstorms, running around in the rain, soaking wet clothes, raw emotion. i remember that i had felt like i had to hold my emotions in for so long in my relationship that had just ended and these people that i was surrounding myself with now.. they were telling me that it was OK to feel things, and to really just go off and let it all out. there was this one particular afternoon where i was sitting in our friend thaniel’s backyard, and he was reading to us something that he had written in his journal and it was just so beautiful and honest and out of no where a huge thunderstorm started rolling in, and we ran across the street to a huge soccer field and i remember just being so mad at myself because i was so full of so many things that i still couldnt stay outloud, but i really wanted too, and i was watching these two beautiful, honest people just fucking running around in the rain, and i was freezing and my heart was exploding and i just started crying and they came over to me and asked me what was wrong, and it was the first time in so long that somebody asked me that question and genuinely was interested in the answer, and i just went off and started spilling all of my guts in this thunderstorm, and i know it’s really cliche and sort of ridiculious but that was a moment that i knew i was going to be okay. i don’t know, we went back to thaniel’s house, and all three of us took off our wet clothes and stood in the warm shower together in our underwear, and it was perfect. that summer really changed my life. it was a long, long time ago. but here is a link to a video from it….http://www.youtube.com/user/polaroids#p/u/72/QWWFBmaCahM
4. so you can a boyfriend. tell us how much you love him.
i don’t really know if this is supposed to be condescending or not…. i know that i do write a lot of stuff about drew in here? he lives two hours away in moose jaw, and i miss him a lot of the time because really only get to spend a few weekends out of the month together, in all honesty. it’s still sort of brand new love in the gives me butterflies and i feel like an idiot because i don’t know how to find the right words without stringing together cliches kind of way. but yes. i do love him. a lot. he is cold blooded and as tall as me and he is the most understanding boy i have met in a really long time, and if i am brutally honest, he tells me that he loves me and i get the familiar flutter in my heart that i kind of forgot i could feel, and it feels pretty great.
fashion statement of the century.
"When you’re a teenager and in your early twenties [love] seems desperately eternal and excruciatingly painful. Whereas as you grow older you realise that most things are excruciatingly painful and that is the human condition. Most of us continue to survive because we’re convinced that somewhere along the line, with grit and determination and perseverance, we will end up in some magical union with somebody. It’s a fallacy, of course, but it’s a form of religion. You have to believe. There is a light that never goes out and it’s called hope."
Morrissey (via natalieenne) (via noeyelids)
(via sabino)
Dennis: I swallowed some apple seeds today.
Mac: Did you make yourself throw up?
Dennis: I tried, I couldn’t.
Mac: Smoke cigarettes, the smoke will suffocate the bacteria in your stomach.
(via sabino)
Lilly McElroy’s “I Throw Myself At Men” project is now up at the online gallery WIPNY—and I love it. It’s exactly what it sounds like, but here is the artist’s statement:
I am, at the moment, part projectile and part foolish romantic. These images are documents of a hopeful and violent gesture, a demand that the possibility of a connection exist. The men often look terrified or at least slightly surprised. My role as aggressor is clear and I think my leaps acknowledge the basic human desire for contact.
To date, there have been no major injuries.
There are 14 other photos just like this one. Great.
oh dear fucking god !
